November 1, 2016

Started working on a novel for NaNoWriMo, Figured I would post the opening here.  Shaping it into an irreverent work on werewolves.

Most people have been living with the understanding that werewolves have a deadly allergy to silver. While true, this believe leaves out that werewolves are have shown aversions to peppermint, fennel seeds and a particularly rare species of flea that has not been known to survive outside of a particular providence deep in the Congo. Studies have confirmed that while that species of flea is unable to survive outside of it’s home region, it is effective when employed against werewolves. Werewolf hunters of old had tried to crossbreed this species with limited results as the desired traits could not be maintained, although a technique had been developed where one could infect a werewolf community.

The history of werewolves and their lives has long been a debated topic. While most scholars believe they had an unfortunate origin in the regions of Eastern Europe, they had migrated from that area many centuries ago. In an odd twist, werewolves had settled into the much maligned Canadian provence of Quebec, making up a majority of it’s population. Along with the unsettling reluctance to maintain the absurdity of their French heritage, the presence of werewolves made Quebec a much avoided place. In the Elections, werewolves did not bother to run for office, as such campaigns had always derailed by scandals. Not that they were known to be particularly criminal in any regard. In fact, in almost all cases their opponents were decidedly more corrupt and reviled. With such things, a report of the candidate doing something of an unsavory nature—usually hunting wildlife or participating in the other accepted werewolf pack activities—while transformed and steer public opinion away from supporting said candidates. Usually the apologies from both sides would become such a distraction that the werewolf candidate would resign. As this had been consistently the case, werewolves generally declined to run for office.

Martin considered all this as he prepared for his upcoming trip. Reviewing all he knew about the area was a necessity given the nature of his work. As a health inspector for the Canadian government, he had been fortunately blessed to avoid drawing the short straw and being sent on assignment into Quebec. While the government agencies preferred to maintain their normal rounds for their workers, all had a habit of politely declining the assignments in Quebec. Having politely accepted these declines, supervisors and directors needed to find a way to inspect conditions within the province. So it became a rotating assignment. When it came each person’s turn, they went about it without complaint, although the consistency of inspections was always in question.

Martin’s turn had come up. His French was woefully underdeveloped, which would present a problem at certain establishments. He reviewed the addresses on his roster to determine how much of a challenge this round will be.

Martin leaned back in his chair as he considered. He ran his fingers through his black hair and groaned. His eyes closed for a moment.

Getting ready to make the French Connection, eh?”

Martin looked up at the door to his office, seeing Marika standing there. The raven-haired woman intimidated most men with her thick frame, seducing the rest with her sensual face and dangerous curves. She smiled. She wore a black pantsuit today, looking more authoritative than anything.

You do any of these on your last rounds?” he asked. He showed her the roster. “I’m wondering how quickly I can get through them.”

She took the list and gave it a quiet evaluation.

Good crowd,” she observed. “You’ll be fine. Couple of werewolves, nice ones though. They run a bakery outside of Montreal. If you can, see if they have any Banoffee Pie?”

I’ll see what I can do,” he offered. “No need to worry about the werewolves?”

Not really. They generally police themselves and stay out of trouble. They tend to stick to the Lycan Deal pretty closely.”

The Lycan Deal. When it became public knowledge that a sizable portion of Quebec’s population were in fact werewolves, the rest of Canada grew considerably concerned. Not necessarily the citizens of Quebec themselves. They were just glad that they were mocked slightly less as result of their cohabitants. So came the Lycan Deal. Negotiations were fairly quick and on the mark. The werewolves would remain in Quebec and stay there with the goal of avoiding trouble at all costs. The rest of Canada would politely facilitate this and benefit from their presence. That had been fifteen years ago and thus far it had gone according to plan. The government provided necessary healthcare and benefits while the werewolves kept their collective noses clean.

You ever meet a werewolf?”

Marika’s question caught him off guard. He hadn’t really thought about it.

Not that I’m aware of,” he answered. “I don’t make it over there very often and they aren’t supposed to come here, right?”

They aren’t prisoners,” she scoffed. “They are allowed to go on holiday once in awhile.”

I know that. But, to answer your question, I don’t think I have met a werewolf.”

You really should. I hooked up with on my last time through, it was a wild time.”

You mean…”

I never hooked up with a werewolf before, so I set him up. Phony complaint. Locked him in with the ‘you do this or you’ll never sell pastries again” act. Had a great time.”


Power corrupts, even among health inspectors. Don’t tell me you’ve never thought about taking advantage of some poor little thing, telling her you’ll shut her down if she doesn’t do as you ask.”

As hot of a porno as that sounds, it would likely blow up in my face.”

Never know until you try.”

Sage advice.”


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