Resolutions for 2o16

December 27, 2015

This might become an ongoing entry as I sort through the miasma of my life and try to get it sorted out.  To start off:

 

  • To actually make some money off of comics.  I’m a lot closer than I was, but the mental, physical and emotional commitment to work at this point is too much, and I need to reduce that before I can go where I need to with the comics.  Bit of a tie-in to being done with working midnights.  I signed up for the utility job in part for the money and the time to do other things those hours would provide.  Neither of those have really been utilized.  I could end up making more in the long run if I go back to the line and I’m smart about things with better time management and less stress.  Would like to be getting the ball rolling on some self-publishing ventures as well, get back into that game.
  • Archery and Kayaking.  Always had a passing interest in those, might want to spend some time and effort on enjoying some recreational endeavors involving those.  Just in general have more recreational activities going on.
  • To make sure communication effectively happens.  If there was one thing that bothered me about my breakup with LMCBW, it was this stupid crack she made at the end about us not talking at the end.  That was the one line that actually just pissed me off.  I spent a lot of time waiting for her to be ready to have a real conversation where it would be an actual talk, not her telling me what to think the whole time or pressuring me into the end she wanted.  I should have kicked her ass and made her have those real talks.  Even if it did hurt her.  But I didn’t think she could handle it.  I guess if I didn’t believe she could handle those things, it was probably time to end the relationship regardless.  Either way, I need to do a bit better with making sure communication is effective.
  • To be in a healthy relationship.  There are a few girls I’m interested in getting to know better.  I’m really just waiting to be done with this utility job before I pursue any of those options.  I could see myself being very happy with those opportunities, but I want an opportunity to do it right and actually bring something on all levels.  Not where I am a zombie 80% of the time.  To actually cook and eat dinner with her every night.  To go on dates without it being dependent on mutual days off or time.  To snuggle up and have somebody asleep with me.  To just talk.  To watch movies together without drifting off to sleep all the time.  Those are the stupid little things I miss.  The things I want.
  • Get a house.  Or very close to getting one.  The house from last year was just a bad situation all around.  The house itself just… it was just never going to be ours.  Maybe hers.  I don’t know.  I never really could stop thinking of it as her sister and brother-in-law’s place.  Houses have a personality and a memories to them.  It’s just like any other relationship.  If you don’t fit there, it won’t be home.  This gets back to the relationship resolution–if I’m serious enough with somebody, I would want to make sure we both fit and not force it.  Still a lot of pieces to come together for that, but I’d still like to figure out a better idea of what I’m looking for at some point next year.
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